Having seen the Right Honourable Mr Morris’ post about his Christmas cheer I will now add my own and some thoughts on why it has become such a depressing event when I have had some great times over the Christmas holiday in the past.

Firstly the media’s generated mass frenzy with such coverage of  ‘black Friday’ that was an utterly pointless event. On this I am sick to death of importing the worst of American culture onto Britain: we used to be far too sane for this thing to take hold but, we now appear to have a mindless majority of ‘reality(?)’ programme morons who have been taught to whoop senselessly if anyone on tv, or in a band, opens their mouth. For this I lay the majority of the blame clearly in the hands of the media.

Consider the storms that hit the West Coast of Britain: When did that natural feature become a weather bomb? This was so ridiculous even a lot of the presenters were querying its use. What on Earth happened to good old fashion ‘bad weather?’  I just hope we get a ‘heatwave torpedo’ this summer.

Continuing with my attack on the media; Christmas films have been broadcast daily since early November. Not that I mind ‘It’s a Wonderful Life’ or any other classics but, non stop screenings of the ‘Boy Who Saved Christmas’ is really going too far. What will we get for Christmas day? I should think it will be such Christmas classics like: Lord of the Rings, Spiderman, X-Men, Iron Man, Harry Potter or Matrix.

Shopping is getting worse and worse every year, despite the fact many stores are open right up to Christmas Eve and even more open for January sales on Boxing Day.  So why the hell did those crackpots fight over obsolescent electrical devices like they were just delivered from the future?  I suspect it was because it was all on TV about what bargains they could get if they went loony like the Yanks.  What’s more I am willing to bet half the fools were taking selfies of themselves getting crushed on their smart phones where they could have searched the whole world from the comfort of their own living rooms and got better bargains online.

To add to all the old grannies that are out and about blocking the aisles are now added the tribes of chavs; Mom, daughter and half a dozen kids, some in double decker pushchairs, slowing trawling their way through the shops, pausing for long periods to stare bewilderedly at some object drawn to their attention by the closest member. Then just as the mob proceeds to advance, one of them at the back calls out ‘Have you seen this?’  and despite having spent the previous fifteen minutes scrutinising it most closely, they all dutifully gather round and re-examine the precious bog rolls.

I am not much of a fan of shopping at the best of times unless it is for toys; for me, or my Granddaughter.  What drives me to despair, is that having braved the malevolent crowds to purchase stuff for Annette, I find that it is no longer to her taste, despite the jumper/skirt having been clearly indicated as something to buy, or it is the wrong size. For whatever reason I find that I have been pushed and shoved by a greedy mob to give Annette something to take back in January.  I really don’t see the reason why I should put myself through the hassle.

What has changed?  We all have too much money now that is what. If we haven’t then there are far too many options to buy things without cash; credit cards, store cards, buy mow pay later etc.  I remember as a child, my grandmother telling me they used to get an orange for Christmas and how much she enjoyed it.  Why was this? It was something special that they could only afford as a special treat and something they would not see very often throughout the year. Today it is possible to buy strawberries all year round at a reasonable price and I still have my dream of producing a December strawberry in my garden.

I used to think my Nan was daft for wanting an orange at Christmas but, clearly her happy memories made it just as special to her even though we had much more then than she had.  My Christmases were important too, despite there being a fairly tight budgets all round the Beacon estate, the majority of children not only got their favourite toy but, also enough surprises to make it special.  One of the regular purchases was a gallon of orange juice that was meant to last me and my brother for the Christmas week but, rarely lasted three days.

Today, we go out and buy what we think we want as much as what we actually need throughout the year and so many of the gifts are undermined by being more of the same we have treated ourselves to over the previous eleven months.  Either that or they are the latest version of the perfectly good piece of ‘cannot live without’ technology, that costs an absolute fortune and despite it having the extra green button we know will be replaced in June by the new version with extra  green and blue buttons.

Now what really gets my goat is that the Amblecote church hall committee have started blocking our traditional all day games at the club. Not because they have any religious services or functions but, rather because they can squeeze and extra few pounds out of a group of overweight women that think bouncing the hall floor up and down for twenty minutes will make them lose the extra stone they have put on over 25th December brunch feasting.  Or they have decided it would be an excellent time for a bring and buy sale and everyone can scramble again for a pair of reindeer socks or flashing Rudolf nose that someone has realised they didn’t need.

Of course we are constantly reminded of the true meaning of Christmas:

“Little Umbongo won’t be drinking clean water this year……he won’t even have electricity to charge his iphone……only £2 a month could supply him with enough money to buy an gold topped battery so he can sing along to the latest Bandaid song….please give generously……and don’t forget; the snow leopards, rhinos, ebola victims, three toed sloths and the resurrect the dodo project.”

Will I be helping little Umbong? Not a cat in hells chance, I try to live within my means, well the money I am aware off.  Annette seems to have a secret stash some place that appears when she wants something like a Caribbean holiday.

It is all too jaded by far.  Only bright side is the chance to catch up with friends if they are not off on some Christmas Sunshine holiday and of course, every grandparent’s  biggest buzz, seeing the look of amazement on the grand children’s face when they open their gifts. Mind you, you can often get the same look of pure delight by giving a different bar of chocolate.

We need to get back to basics; spend less, remember that despite being hijacked by the Christian Church, it is a festival that celebrates the beginning of the end of winter as the nights once again grow shorter.  Maybe make do with the old Iphone  case we brought two weeks ago for a little longer and give the £11 we would have spent to a real charity in the spirit of doing good.

OK, you got me; I’m just grumpy ’cause Santa still hasn’t put Kylie Minogue in my Christmas stockings. Merry Christmas Everyone.