Well we all get them, but this was particularly weird as there were no naked women in it! It was so vivid I decided to bore you all with it.
It appears I was working in a huge two storey school and the head teacher, looking like a cross between Heinrich Himmler and the guy who plays ‘Jaws’ in the Bond movies, came round giving everyone a hideous cardigan (imagine Noel Edmonds on speed) but, he ignored me. He even gave one to Ash Hewitt (war gaming friend of some years) and I commented “It looks like he’s trying to get rid of me.” Ash, true to form said “You ain’t missing much, they’re vile! You can have mine if you want.”
The next moment I’m walking about what appears to be a big sports hall come assembly room talking to some staff and I see some small black shapes slowly passing behind me and hear a ping sound. I look down at my feet and I can see they are bullets. As I glance nonchalantly towards the entrance I see a sniper is firing at me and I think he’s not much good I could stand here all day and he wouldn’t hit me. As if recognising this fact two more soldiers start to set up a GPMG (general purpose heavy machinegun) alongside him and I realise they could hardley fail to hit me once that is ready. Outside there are more soldiers patrolling the playgrounds.
Still totally calm I notice there is a large stack of breeze blocks to my left and think well I could hide from the sniper all day there but, the MG will blast them to shreds I’d better use them as cover and get out of the window. The window is incredibly difficult to open and when I start to climb out it appears to grow in height and I find it a struggle but, manage to get out before the MG starts. The guards have their back to me and I slip into a corridor.
Walking along the corridor I see a police checkpoint with two officers sitting at a school desk and I proceed to tease them mercilessly producing a cardboard policeman’s helmet from thin air and they are annoyed wanting to arrest me but, are totally incapable of catching me. I laugh and slowly walk away to their threats to get me.
Next I am outside on the playground talking to a woman teacher who tells me they are looking for me and still I am as calm and happy as can be. I find the whole affair a big joke. Shortly after speaking to her I drifted back into consciousness and lay in my pit thinking this is too good to let fade away I must record it and so here it all is in it’s dodgy glory.